I was once an active blogger. I stopped when I have lost my touch in writing. I wonder why. Any advise?

I write for myself, I write for them, and most of all I write for you.

Cerita Malam Tadi.

Aku tak sedar bila benda ni berlaku, tapi aku rasa baru jugak. Sebab dua malam sebelumnya aku tengok account Facebook dia. Malam tadi, a friend of mine tweeted me. Dia kata ada benda nak bagitahu. So aku pun came online and we had a chat. 

I was told that I was deleted from her friend list. Okay, fine. I'm good. I'll be fine without you being my friend, both in real life and in the social network world. So, the story goes, her beloved girlfriend stalked us. Sebab jealousy, I supposed. And I came to know that not only me, but ramai lagi kawan-kawan yang kena delete because of jealousy jugak. 

Seriously, perempuan (the girlfriend, not my used-to-be-now-deleted-friend), kau sedar tak kau tu dah tua, dah layak bertaubat. She's fucking 19, she deserves her freedom  That is not what you claimed as love. Where in the world can you find a love that take friends' away from each other? Dumbass. You are being immature. But I don't blame you alone, though. 

To you my used-to-be-friend, you enslaved yourself to her. That was your choice. You choose to be with her, pledged yourself to her. Sekarang ni kalau betullah kawan-kawan kau bengang sungguh dengan kau, janganlah cari balik. Aku mungkin tak terkesan sangat, tapi kalau ada yang betul-betul terhiris hati dengan kau, pandai-pandai lah kau. 

Just that, I hope one day you will come to realise that whatever you do now will affect you in every way in your life. And I mean, whatever, IF.. you know what I mean.

We've decided to go to Ipoh for this year's eid. Should be fun, I thought. And it did! Difference is that, this year we stayed in a hotel instead of our kampung.

Mak Long called once we reached Simpang Pulai's toll. Telling us that her family's cleaning our Opah's house. So Daddy stopped by the house to see the progress. It has been a long time since our last visit. After Opah passed, we left for Sudan. Since then, we never visited the house.

So our eid this raya was not entirely different, just that we had to wake up earlier because we need to go to our Opah's house.

After the 'orang surau' came by, we went for 'melanggar' a lot. Like a lot a lot. LOL.

On the second day of 'raya', we went back to KL to repack for Muar trip.

Yesterday (August 17th, 2011), we had our first Dispensed Preparation Method II test. We thought, it was supposed to be things like classifications, how to make this and that, you know, easy things. But it turned out to be entirely different. I mean like, literally. It was as if, our lecturer nak kenakan kitorang kaw kaw! You know, 'Oh, now you know the real deal to be a Pharmacist!'. Dang it it was freaking killing us!!

Lepas tu, semua memang jangan cerita lah, muka ketat keluar kelas. Pfft! I hope my result will turn out JUST FINE.

July 10th, 2011

Anniversary gift Rawrstar gave me. Thanks, Love.

27th July, 2011

Not exactly the day I would treasure in my diary, but I feel like writing still. 

Class started as usual. The same lecturer, the same class, the same subject and the same timing. God, this is boring. So we were taking out our stuff (book, etc) and suddenly the lecturer boomed us, "This is my last chapter with you." 

We were stunned, and many of us would love to not have any class tomorrow since, well, they were all thinking that there will be no lecturer to teach us. But I personally think, there WILL be one. And duh, please our dearest Program Manager, do take us out from this curse of having a boring lecturer. 

So yeah, that's about it. Two classes today. 

- Feels like showing off this image of myself. 

- New glasses.

Somehow, I'm kinda liking this picture. Yes, I am vain. 

Esok.

Esok merupakan hari jadi si dia. Mulanya, aku nak bagi hadiah hari Ahad nanti walaupun ulang tahunnya esok. Tapi tadi bila minta si dia datang hostel, katanya tak nak. Tup tup ada kat bawah tengah tunggu aku turun. Cepat-cepat aku keringkan badan *lepas mandi*. Jadinya, sarung apa yang tercapai, terus keluar. Belum sempat sampai pintu rumah, aku patah balik ambil cincin yang aku beli dengan tisu.

Bila aku keluar lif, aku nampak si dia tengah duduk atas motor, hisap rokok. Bau rokok macam aku kenal sangat :) *rindu lettew Fa nak smoke* Senyum panjang aku tengok si dia. Gembira hati lah tu kononnya. Aku pun hulurkan tisu yang aku beli tempoh hari kat Leisure Mall. Comel tisu tu. "Nah, Happy Birthday!" Si dia dengan blurnya ambik lah. Senyum je. Mungkin dalam hati merungut. Birthday aku, diberinya card besar dengan kek Secret Recipe. Birthday dia, aku hulur tisu comel je.

Duduk dekat parking area tu, borak-borak sikit. Lepas tu, si dia letak kan kepalanya atas peha aku sambil aku acah-acah cekik dia.

"I want to ask you a question, may I?" berdebar aku mulakan. "Sure," balasnya sambil melihat jam.
"Will you stay with me even if I am fucked up, messed up and just still be with me and be my perfect lover?" Katanya membalas apa aku cakap, dia tak perfect. Takpe, aku kata "Be mine." Aku keluarkan cincin dalm kotak heart, aku hulurkan. Tersenyum dia. Terus aku sarungkan cincin.

To you: I love you so much. Happy 19th birthday, May GOD bless you and live a happy life :)

Semester 4.

Our new semester started on July 11th, 2011. Well, I thought it will be a fun semester since one of the senior said it wasn't gonna be as tough as our second semester. But it turned out to be just the same. I am still trying to think positive of it. We get our schedule on Monday itself, but we knew that our Monday class will start at 10 a.m. Once the schedule was in my hand, I found out that our schedule is sooooo damn packed. =.=!' What a start. Pfft!

What happened?

Ever felt like you think you know what happen but you actually don't? Ever felt like you think like you are getting it straight but when you try to do so, you are actually making it worst? How can you entangle it?